Best Friend Part II

Before moving on into the multi-dog world, let me just quickly say again, Dare is my best friend, my first love when it comes to dogs. Dare has been in my life the majority of my post-dad years. He’s been up to White Salmon (where my dad’s buried) almost as much as I have. When I was lying almost comatose in my bed with no heat, in the middle of a snowstorm, Dare, with Dazzle, was by my side (of course; that could be a puppy pile for extra heat). For every major (and even minor) decision I’ve ever made, Dare has been there for me to hold. Before we moved to Arizona, instead of packing, Dare and I would lie in bed on our backs, him snuggled up against me, my arm around him. We still do, on occasion, but after almost a year in Arizona, I think we’re both a bit more settled. 

Now – on with the story.

Originally my family had gotten a bichon for a couple reasons – I’m not allergic to their hair (I break out in bad hives playing with Golden Retrievers, German Shepards- the long haired dogs), also we lived in an apartment in the Czech Republic – and none of us thought it would even begin to be fair to bring a bigger dog home into an apartment. Now, though, I lived in a house and I’d long wanted a bigger dog to play fetch and wrestle with, and take swimming. My first choice was a Portuguese Water dog, and we met one but he wasn’t what I was looking for. I’d originally been against Standard Poodles, actually, because of the fancy grooming and they can be so standoffish – but I saw one at a dog park with Dare and Dare and this Standard just played and played and that was what I wanted for him.

Eventually we picked up our new puppy, and stayed the night over at my mom’s (he was quite the drive away from us). We hadn’t named our new puppy yet – and the poor guy was scared. He hadn’t been socialized much, his meals were free feeding with his littermates and he’d never been in a car, never experienced air conditioning, etc., not to mention, and never been away from his family before. We’d brought the crate for him, since as a puppy of course he wouldn’t be house trained. That first night he whined and whined and it wasn’t just to be let outside – he just didn’t know what was going on. I’m still not sure it wasn’t for self-preservation, so Dare could get some sleep, but one time when we were bringing the puppy back into the house into the crate, Dare just went straight into the crate with the puppy and laid down. We all slept pretty peacefully after that.

How this puppy’s name came about is all my mother’s fault. We were sitting at her house the next morning, trying to come up with a name, all she said about it was “Not another D name, please, we’ve already got Dazzle and Dare.” Naturally, my husband went straight to the D’s in the dictionary we were searching and found “Da’shain”.  It means, “Peaceful One” in a language from a book series my husband and I both enjoy.

Raising Da’shain was a mixture of amazing fun and pure confusion. My dreams came true with how much he loved to fetch – throw something, anything, and he’ll go after it (and bring it back!). I spent countless hours rewarding him every time he brought something back. More hours on teaching him how to “find ball” or “find toy” and he knows the difference! Teaching him not to jump was a big one too, since he would mimic Dare – his “older” and yet so much smaller brother. I learned that habits that are “cute” in a little dog, or at least not as harmful, are not so cute in a bigger dog. It was confusing though because while Da’shain played fine with Dare (albeit sometimes dragging Dare outside by Dare’s ear), Da’shain was literally terrified of other dogs.

When we first brought Da’shain home, we took him to a dog park that we liked going to. His first experience, however, was not a great one. A young dog, probably about his age, was running with a pack and plowed right into Da’shain, knocking him over – and then he did it again. He would be fine with the other dogs around, but when they approached, he’d literally expose his belly to them. He also seemed to really, really hate the bark dust from that park, didn’t like running on it at all. Since Dare was fine anywhere, plus the people at that park seemed to be more interested in showing up to socialize while letting their dogs roam, and not really keeping an eye on them, we moved parks.

Let me point out, we only kept going to the parks because Da’shain loved to run for the ball, he loved to play fetch and our backyard wasn’t huge, plus I didn’t want him terrified every time another dog approached him. Da’shain got to the point where he was able to ignore the other dogs quite well, and didn’t drop his ball every time they approached him. He even played with a select few – which was great. We never tried to force him, and when left alone he’d start wandering and sniffing on his own. In fact – he was also fast friends with my mother-in-law’s dog, whom she got because she loved our dogs so much so she wanted one of our own.

It wasn’t actually getting the second dog that taught me a LOT about a multi dog household, but it was a start. Dare and Da’shain did get one on another’s nerves sometimes. Actually, Dare was mostly pissy when we watched Dazzle for too long. We watched Dazzle for my mom often; when she was gone traveling, or in the wintertime, she helps her husband run a Christmas tree farm, so we’d watch over the little guy for a couple months in the winter. Dazzle is older – and less picky about which food bowl he eats from and a couple times he’d wander over and try to steal Dare’s food while Dare was still eating. As you can imagine, Dare did not take kindly to that. That was my first experience with feeding dogs separately (my two self-regulated really well, didn’t over-eat – never finished if they weren’t still hungry, and they never ate from the other’s bowl).

Da’shain was also quite shy about any sudden noises, anything he couldn’t see coming, to this day he still jumps slightly if his back is touched without him seeing it coming. He was a terror on the leash, both from being not leash trained and from being leash aggressive. All of these things were new and different to me. I’ve loved dogs since I was a kid, but didn’t have a lot of hands on experience. I mean, we had a Cocker Spaniel until I was 15, and friends down the street had Golden Retrievers (one of whom I taught to sit, come and stay) and other family dogs but that’s still not a variety of experience. All of that experience came later (and it’s only just beginning ).

The rest of Da’shain’s story is actually tied up in the next part of the story. It’s about my little chicken finally emerging from his cocoon (mixing metaphors, but I’ll take it).